2 Months…a few weeks late

My baby boy…you have changed my life in just two short months.

You arrived just as my life was falling to pieces. I thought that I wouldn’t make it through. It was the hardest thing I ever had to do. But then you came along and you built me up. You filled in the gaps where my heart was yearning.


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I didn’t know if I ever wanted to be a mom, but being your mommy is the best thing that has ever happened to me.


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You little smile lights up my heart. Your ooohs and agoos are the only sounds I ever want to hear. You fist clinched around my hair or my shirt or my finger are the only embrace I need.  I watch you sleep and just be for hours at a time. I’m not a morning person, but our mornings together are my new favorite thing.  You bring joy to every one you meet.


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We just started on this little journey, I can’t wait to see what the next two months bring.

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Getting to know me

Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest? Oprah

Would you like to be famous? In what way? Yes, for doing something amazing, or having a rockstar business with a product that everyone needs..a la Spanx

Before making a phone call, do you ever rehearse what you’re going to say? Why? Sometimes, if it’s an important call or it’s something that I don’t want to talk about

What would constitute a perfect day for you? A drink in one hand, book in the other, toes in the sand watching the ocean roll in and out

When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else? you are my sunshine to my Ethan

If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you choose? Mind- I’ve seen what its like to lose your mind….

Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die? Probably of old age or #6

For what in your life do you feel most grateful? Love, to give love and receive it is what life’s about

If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be? that we were poor… i never had to go without, but I missed out on some fun opportunities

If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future or anything else, what would you want to know? Am I on the right path

Is there something that you’ve dreamt of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it? Travel….money….or not having the right priorities with money to make travel more important

What is the greatest accomplishment of your life? Staying true to myself when most people wouldn’t…and my Ethan

What do you value most in a friendship? Having someone to share a memory with

What is your most treasured memory? Time spent with loved ones

What is your most terrible memory? witnessing abuse between my BF and her boyfriend

If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why? YES! I would not waste my life behind a computer everyday. I would travel the world and fill my life with experiences

What does friendship mean to you? It means having someone to confide in, sharing in lifes joys and helping each other through the hard stuff.

What roles do love and affection play in your life? I love love.

How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s? Yes, my childhood was happier than others. My family isn’t necessarily close…like visiting all the time, but definitely warm.

How do you feel about your relationship with your mother? We used to be closer, but we still have a good relationship.

When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself? A few days ago

What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about? no, i think anything can be joked about, just chose your audience and timing appropriately


The Perfect Man


My Granny gave me a homework assignment, to write down everything I want in a man…everything…so here we go

tall                                                        handsome

strong jaw line                                   strong nose

dark hair                                              light eyes

fit…but not too fit                              nice

has good values                             will love my Ethan

family centered                              loves animals

rides a motorcycle                            strong hands

nice arms                                                active

likes art and reading                       creative

successful                                        goal oriented

FUNNY                                        friendly

sociable                                       dresses well

cares about his appearance            can cook

loves to hang out on rainy days           has a good group of friends

believes in god                                    gentleman

chivalrous                                will sweep me off my feet

will love me as much as i love him

will support me in my career                        gentle soul

sensitive                                            in touch with his feelings

conversationalist                          takes initiative

adaptable                                no drugs

good listener                    leader

not jealous                            direct

faithful                                   honest

mature                                      confident

optimist                                  respects parents

patience                                       reliable

trustworthy                            attractive

financially secure                           hard working

balanced                                        spontaneous

protector                      will put as much into the relationship as I do




What qualities does your perfect man have?

An opportunity missed

Before the riot gear, before the tear gas, before the media swarm….there  was an opportunity missed.

I remember the day clearly, it was my nephews birthday and I was headed to Hudson Park, just a few blocks from the incident, for his 3rd birthday party.  I was driving down 270 when a stream of white SUVs zoomed past me with their lights, but no sirens on. I arrived to the party as we began to have cake and ice cream we heard the fire station alarms going off about 5 blocks away.

It seemed a little weird, but nothing too alarming.

It turns out, just down the street, Michael Brown had been shot by a police officer and was left laying in the street for 4 hours. We all know what happened from here: crowds gathered, police arrived, force was used, violence erupted, and the media tagged on like there was no tomorrow.

But before the violence erupted, there was this very short period of time when something powerful happened. A period between 4pm and midnight where the crowds had gathered and the police were gaining…and there was just protest. There was a gathering in the community to fight the injustice of police brutality and racism. The images I saw were powerful. They were reminiscent of the civil rights protests in the 60’s.


Image from vox.com

Can you imagine what the world would have seen, if these were the only images that the media had to report on?


Image from stltoday.com

If the Ferguson community, had come together to show their outrage in a peaceful way? If the hundreds of people that gathered, came together to show that they were tired of the mistreatment in the community.


Image from nbcnews.com

If the hundreds had become thousands and the thousands spread to other cities and we all came together in peace? The world would have had to listen.  There would have been change. The message would have come across so clearly, there would have been no denying the issue at hand. We would have been forced to have a conversation about what is wrong and really going on in America. Ferguson could have gone into the history books as a defining moment of change.

But something happened…


Image from New York Daily News

The peace was interrupted and the message overshadowed.

Our community was ransacked…stereotypes that plague the black community and perpetuate the racism emerged and businesses were destroyed.



Image from nbcnews.com


The media began to focus on the war zone that our little community had become. Riot gear, tear gas, bullets, smoke, sirens, profanity, looting and vandalism became the face of our hometown. The message disappeared as quickly at QT went up in flames.